Aaron comes to him at night, all naked and pale and slim like Nick used to be, and begs Nick to fuck him. His body is pure white in the moonlight, unblemished and perfect.


When Nick refuses, he slides under the bedcovers like a snake, draping himself and rubbing his body against Nick’s, slick and hot and tempting. All that soft babyskin, heated like no kid’s should be. Nick pretends not to feel Aaron’s dick hard against him.


Aaron never, ever gives up.


“Why not.”


“Go to sleep.”


“No, Nick. Why not?”


“You know why not. Now go to sleep.”


No.” Even though its dark, Nick knows the look that accompanies that tone of voice. Set jaw, narrowed eyes, that cute little pouting mouth. “I don’t know why. Tell me.” Voice low now, accompanied by a nuzzle against Nick’s neck.


Nick squeezes his eyes shut, even though he can’t see it. Takes a deep breath. “I’m your big brother. Its just…its not right, Aaron.”


“Our whole fucking lives aren’t right.”


“Don’t try to make this into a metaphor,” Nick says, rolling his eyes, but he holds Aaron a little tighter.


“You don’t even know what a metaphor is,” Aaron grumbles into Nick’s neck. So smug and so fucking cute in his “superior” intellect. Nick doesn’t want to tell him that they’ve just learned different things, and that Nick used to dream about college when he was Aaron’s age, too. Can’t tell. Won’t tell.


“Shut up. Its against the law.”


Aaron twists in Nick’s arms to look at him, bracing his arms on Nick’s chest. “That’s just so brothers and sisters don’t have, like, freakish babies or something. We’re boys.” Hot breath against Nick’s lips, both of them nose to nose now, a whisper apart. “I won’t get pregnant if you come in me.”


Nick doesn’t even try to hide his shudder. “No. Just—no. You’re thirteen.”




“Still. Just a—”


“Don’t fucking call me a kid, Nicky.” The voice is no longer that of a frustrated kid, but of a thoroughly pissed off…man-child. Nick had forgotten how the kid button always set Aaron off, but somehow this makes it easier to deal with. Aaron seems less like a child when he’s hissing obscenities and bristling like an offended cat. “I’m not and you know it. I’m fourteen and screwed up and I feel old—” His voice almost breaks, but he covers it with a knowing smirk. “You were never a kid, either. And I know about you and Brian. You were my age then.”


Nick freezes. Shuts his eyes and just breathes, breathes in the sweet smell of Aaron’s shampoo mixed with his musky boy smell. Finally speaks to say, “Yeah. Okay, yeah. But I can’t. I’m supposed to take care of you, and I can’t do that to you. Let Dad—”




Nick throws him a disgusted look. “Not like that. Ew. I just mean, let them fuck you up, because I can’t stop it, but I’m not going to help. I won’t let that happen to you.” Like it happened to me rings through the room just as loudly as if it had been said.


“Nicky.” Aaron cups Nick’s jaw, turns his head so that Nick has to look at him. His eyes are wide and awake and so fucking tired that it hurts. He looks old, jaded, the way Nick knows he feels. “If you do it, it won’t make me any worse than I am. It won’t.”


Nick shakes his head. Closes his eyes so he wont have to see all that knowledge. “I won’t corrupt you. I can’t do that to you.” He doesn’t know who he’s trying to convince, Aaron or himself.


“Nicky…” Aaron reaches down. Wraps Nick’s hand around his cock. “Nicky, I’m already corrupt.”


Nick can’t disagree. Just shudders in a breath and strokes, pets, loves.


If Aaron can’t feel like he’s pure, at least he can feel good.



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